Why it takes me so long to get ready for a workout

I was too lazy to remind him.

I am a lazy girl. I used to think that I hated working out but actually, I hate getting sweaty because I’m too lazy to take a shower afterword. I will gladly do squats for days and work out my abs and do yoga (but not hot yoga), I just can’t get down with the sweat. I feel like maybe I’m secretly a goddess and subconsciously I know that if my sweat touches the ground it will turn into a bubbling spring of healing water. I can’t think of any more logical solution as to why I hate working out so much. I mean like aside from my hair.

It’s like I’m biologically designed to be a woman of leisure. It just takes so long to wash and I am not down with having a sweaty workout and just using dry shampoo. Forget the fact that they have yet to invent a spray that is for real invisible on brunettes, it’s gross. And sadly not that discreet of a secret: I totally have a bald spot. My hair is really heavy. No amount of Googling has resulted in me finding a hairstyle that doesn’t pull at the thinning hair around my part during a workout and it just leaves me wondering if no other woman has this problem. Like, hi I can’t be focused on my hair staying in place while I’m pretending that I can run, I’m too busy keeping my boobs inside my shirt.

And yeah, I get the paradox. I could cut my hair short so I don’t have to worry about the bald spot and it might have a chance of recovering! But why would I cut off hair that I love just to make it easier to do something that I hate? But how much would I hate it if the most annoying part was taken out of the equation? Is testing that solution worth the two years it would take to grow all of my hair back? The answer is no. Because this was never about my hair, it’s about me being lazy. Stop typing and go for a run, Bald Gabby.